It doesn't matter that you can go to basically any grocery store and find a confetti cake mix. That's not the point. Never again will you be able go to Stacey Whatsherface's house and eat five cupcakes, a whole bag of a Cheetos, and a liter of fruit punch and have it bring you the same amount of joy.
Right? Birthday party food just tastes better. The same bag of Cheetos tastes just fifty times better at a birthday party. I don't know why, no one does. It's one of life's greatest mysteries.
Birthday party snacks are easily the highlight for all the guests. Sure, the birthday boy or girl gets a bunch of presents, but we get to destroy that snack table as though it's our job.
How many of these treats do you remember being excited for?
1. Funfetti Cake
Listen, we have to address the elephant in the room, but cake is the most important part of the party. It sets the tone for the day and you know that the kids will be satisfied and appropriately infused with sugar once the time comes. You could go with a chocolate cake, or even a plain vanilla, but there was no moment more exciting then the reveal of a funfetti cake.
Sprinkles literally make everything better, and when you're a kid those sugary little pieces are all you need in your life.
2. Pizza Rolls
After we were all confident in the cake, we could resume our excitement, and stuff our faces full of pizza rolls.
A little bite size pocket of scalding hot cheese and sauce, followed by another that was probably still frozen in the center, followed by one that had opened up completely. Really, it didn't matter what the inside held, because it was perfect.
3. Bagel Bites
Okay, some houses were a pizza roll house, while others were a bagel bite house. You can't really have both, but you absolutely had at least one. These pizza-inspired treats didn't hide their fillings, but they were all still so good.
Even though they were more of an open-faced situation, somehow they could still have frozen centers? I don't know, maybe it was just our oven, but burning outsides with still frozen centers has been the tragic tale of a lot of my Bagel Bite experience.
4. Hamburger Helper
If it was a smaller party and you guys wanted to have a more hearty dinner, Hamburger Helper was always a great choice. It was filling, fast, and pretty much universally enjoyed.
Kids didn't really care too much about how fancy anything was, so a fast and delicious meal that fed everyone for under $5 was ideal.
5. Cosmic Brownies
No snack table was complete without a stack of Cosmic Brownies. Sure, each one had about three sprinkles on it, but they were a necessity and they were DELISH!
Simple, no fuss, and absolutely a crowd-pleaser, I could easily eat 100 of them on my own.
6. Pixie Sticks
Tubes of sugar? PERFECT. That's what every kid needs. These high-energy scream machines needed even more energy and the best way to do that was to just let them eat straight sugar. Perfect.
7. Cheese Balls or Cheetos
Orange fingers go hand-in-hand with a birthday party. It's just a fact that parents have to accept. Their couches, door handles, and even the walls will be covered in little orange stains that are really hard to get out.